Second Chance at Love
by QueenMabShakespeare
Summary: First FanFic. Severus returns unaged after years and takes Harrys only daughter Lily, as his wife an arranged marriage. Can she break through his defenses? Can he learn to let go of his old grievances and give her a chance? Oh just read it please
1. Chapter 1

Seventeen year old Lily Potter stood at the bar at the Hogshead Inn wiping down the bench, gently humming a tune to herself.

The first thing everyone noticed was her hair which was a deep rich auburn – not surprising as her mother and both grandmothers were red heads! The only difference from her maternal lineage is Lily had beautiful soft curls that ran in waves down her back reaching nearly to her waist. Although she never wore it down – preferring to wear in a chaste bun on the top of her head.

It was widely remarked that Lily had the face of an angel and a body that made men groan in longing, with a voice to match and, much to the delight of the owner of the Hogshead Inn, his business had increased substantially since she had started working there on the weekends.

Lily was somewhat of an old-fashioned witch, preferring the traditional clothes of a witch. This included a white blouse scooped low, a black corset laced from the front and folds and folds of white under skirts with a deep wine skirt over top that reached just past her knees.

This made her somewhat of an oddity at Hogwarts and caused some snickers and nasty comments, but she chose to ignore this and focus on her studies, not participating in all the social activities most seventeen year old girls did at her age.

Of course her sorting into Slytherin hadn't helped her popularity and it caused some difficulty as all her family, except Rose who had been sorted into Ravenclaw, had been sorted into Gryffindor. This had caused her to be isolated from most of her relations.

This was made more apparent because both her brothers and all her other relations, with the exception of Rose, were (or had been previously) sorted to Gryffindor. Her family had eventually accepted this - more so her father Harry than her mother Ginny, who was extremely upset about the whole thing and was prepared to go straight to the Headmaster and complain that the Sorting Hat had obviously made a mistake. Only Harry, who guessed the Slytherin connection, managed to convince her mother not to.

Lily also loved to compose music and sing and she could play several musical instruments with great skill. People loved to hear her play and sing; however, she was not given to public performances so it was a rare thing to hear.

In short, was a slight outsider, preferring to remain on the fringe of things. This was in direct contrast to her brother James who was the Captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch Team, a talented wizard and the most popular boy at Hogwarts, especially as his father had been such a hero.

Her chief concern was James best friend Edmund. Edmund, in short, was a bully of the very worst kind.

He had decided long ago that Lily (along with many others) was a good subject to be made fun of, taking every opportunity to embarrass and humiliate her. James turned a blind eye to this and had decided that it was "all in good fun" and to "get with the spirit of it".

However, what James didn't realise is that Edmund was starting to threaten vicious and terrifying things to the younger girl, which caused her to be in fear for a lot of the time at Hogwarts and even at her family home. No one believed her and the threats that Edmund made only got worse when she tried to tell her family.

She had many things weighing on her mind the other was her eighteenth birthday which was only six months away. Her green eyes (that were the same shape and colour as her grandmother and father) darkened and became serious as she thought about what would happen on, or shortly after, that day.

A large figure loomed over Lily "'Er 'ello there Lily".

"Oh hello Hagrid – how are you? One house Ale is it?" Lily replied with a smile, snapping out of her private thoughts and wiping her hands.

"Ah not today thanks". He paused and frowned slightly, shuffling around slightly nervously.

"Actually I have something…I mean _someone_…that… he wants to meet you". He replied in a rush.

Lily frowned and looked at him seriously. If this request had come from anyone else she would have replied that she was not interested in going out with whoever it was and she was unavailable… period.

"…Hagrid?" "I… you know I am not that sort of girl…" she drifted off slightly uncomfortable.

"…Oh no… I'll just get straight to o' point." He leaned in closer making sure no one was listening "You see Lily …this man is part o' that prophecy made when you were just a babe."

Lily went white and felt her legs shaking clutching at the bar for support – she instinctively knew what he was going to say.

Hagrid went on "Yeh see it's not just _any_ man… this man is… Severus Snape". "He wants ta meet yeh upstairs in the red room".

Lily's hand shook on the handle of the door as she opened the door and stepped in.

Standing with his back to her was Severus Snape. He was a tall, lean imposing figure a couple inches over six foot and his black clothes and hair gave him a dark and brooding look. He seemed much younger than his portrait maybe mid thirties. Where had he been all these years and why hadn't he aged. She felt intimidated, scared and her heart was pounding in her chest.

He turned slowly towards her, his arms crossed in front of him; his dark eyes glittered intensely in the dimly lit room as he gazed at her.

Lily could feel power emanating from him – she sensed this was a man that could be very dangerous and to cross him would be a foolish thing to do. She would not want to be an enemy of his.

"Close the door" he ordered – his voice deep and very, very commanding.

Lily stumbled in slightly and shut the door behind her, her breathing slightly shallow and feeling a little light headed and flushed with nerves.

"Do you know why I am here?" he asked moving a couple of steps closer to her. The descriptions that he had heard about her were not exaggerated and he was extremely pleased as he noticed the creamy curve of her shoulders and neck, the large green eyes just like her grandmothers but an infinitely more delectable body, and face, she was rounded and soft hinting at so many delights.

"I …I think so" she whispered, barely audible. She risked a glance at his face; it was much as she remembered from the portrait that hung in the halls of Hogwarts, a proud and icy expression on his face.

How many times had she stood in front of that portrait wondering what it would be like to stand face to face with the original? She was surprised to find that his mouth appeared to be much softer in person than in his portrait.

Snape raised an eyebrow. "Well…?"

Lily opened her mouth shut it again, licking her lips she looked down at the floor trying to find the strength to say what he knew already.

"My father and you made an oath on your death….." she paused opening her mouth but no words came out.

"Yes, continue" he took another step towards her and there was only a few feet separating them. Her spine stiffened when he spoke her name and moved closer. He said her name so softly, almost like a lover might say it, but there was nothing lover-like or yielding about this man.

"That…that if y-you returned… you would claim his first…" she hesitated and stumbled on "…his first daughter for your…your wife on the eve of her eighteenth birthday." Lily took a choking breath and kept her eyes firmly fixed on the floor, to terrified to look at the man who would become her husband shortly.

"Correct" he replied dryly. "And I intend to honor that oath just as your father promised me all those years ago …_and_ more recently" he added just to make sure she understood her father had given his consent to a traditional witch-wizard arranged marriage.

Arranged marriages were not uncommon in the wizarding world but tended to be pure-blood families who wanted to remain that way. It was commonplace for families within the Slytherin house at Hogwarts to promise attachments between families that would eventually lead to marriage.

Lily had known from a very young age that she had been promised to Severus Snape, perhaps that is why she was sorted into Slytherin – the Sorting Hat, out of a sense of loyalty to Severus Snape and her because of her fathers Slytherin ties, had decided this.

Severus frowned slightly as he looked at her bowed head "Will you honor this promise – Miss Potter?"

Lily was a traditional witch who loved and _trusted_ her father dearly – she knew he would not have made this oath lightly or without trusting Severus Snape as her husband.

Lily looked at this man who was quite frankly an enigma. She had tried to find as much information on him as she could but was unable to find any person who truly knew him other than ex-pupils who said he was a terrifying teacher, the odd person who said he had been a Death Eater with Voldemort but had switched sides at some point and her father who would only say that "he was one of the bravest men he ever knew" and "the greatest wizard of all time, Albus Dumbledore, trusted him completely".

She curtsied gracefully and said with a slight waver in her voice "Yes - I will honor this promise – I consent to be your wife" she paused slightly and added,

"You have done so much – sacrificed so much – for my family – I hope…I hope that I may make atonement for all that you have done for my family." Lily braved to look into his eyes and tried to read what was going on behind his cool mask.

He was unreadable – he let nothing past his mask and kept his expression impenetrable and composed.

"Good" he replied, and added sarcastically "and I am sure you are quite capable of _making atonement_ and yes the Potter family does owe me quite a debt."

He had been observing her from the shadows for quite some months and was pleased that she preferred the traditional values, clothes and culture of their world. Of course her beauty, body and face also made her exceedingly attractive.

He was not inexperienced with women. During his time as a Death Eater many females had thrown themselves his way thinking it was a way to win favor with The Dark Lord. He, however, was quite selective and ultimately he found it all unsatisfying and lonely.

Lily was silent – she felt a lurch in her stomach – did he hate her? Did he hate her family? She was confused and very anxious.

Severus could see she was nervous but she had to learn to grow up at some time and give away childish things.

However, she was to be his wife and he had no desire to have an unwilling wife in his bed. So he decided to make some effort to put her at ease.

"I understand you have been sorted into Slytherin?" he said walking over and sitting down in the old wingback armchair, looking relaxed and self-assured.

He gestured for her to sit down in the chair opposite him and Lily slowly walked over and sat a little stiffly in the armchair, he continued.

"Slytherin was my old house and I was Slytherin house master" – "Do you enjoy it or would you rather be with _all_ your family in Gryffindor?"

Lily had never discussed the Sorting Hat decision with anyone, mainly because of what she had felt about being in Gryffindor and the desire to _not_ be sorted there. She knew that if her family knew her true feelings it would cause her mother and grandparents, in particular, to be very upset and perhaps even angry.

Perhaps the house sorting decision was meant for him to hear - being a Slytherin and her soon-to-be husband - so she decided to tell him, after all he was no doubt very skilled in Legilimency and would know if she was lying.

"Truthfully, the only thing I definitely knew is that I _did not_ want to be sorted into Gryffindor". There was more of course – another part was that Edmund, James and his cronies were part of Gryffindor and being sorted there would cause her more problems than she already had. She decided to keep this little piece of information to herself for now.

Severus arched an eyebrow and genuinely looked a little surprised at her response. She continued,

"The Sorting Hat knew this and he also knew that one day I would be marrying a past Slytherin student and house master – he said as much. Perhaps it was out of loyalty to you?" Severus nodded briefly. Lily stopped becoming self-conscious at telling him her thoughts that she hadn't even told her family.

Lily wanted to know more about him, especially as she was going to be his wife, so braved a question of her own.

"May I ask a question?"

He looked a little annoyed and snapped "If you must."

She felt a little rebuffed by his hard manner and was unsure how to be comfortable in his presence. Her nerves were on edge and head was swimming with so many questions about how life was going to change for her.

"The question Lily" Severus said prompting her, slightly impatiently.

"Umm - when do you wish to be married – and will I continue my studies at Hogwarts – and, and am I to l-live with you or remain at Hogwarts…" she in a rush looking at his face and he looked irritated.

"I believe that is more than one question Potter" he said. He shifted in his chair impatiently. "The answers are – I would like to be married on the eve of Micklemass in three weeks time – yes of course you _must_ continue your studies at Hogwarts – and you will live at Hogwarts during the week and stay with me at my residence on weekends and holidays".

Lily was relieved – that was exactly how she had hoped it would be.

He continued coolly - "Do you have any objections?"

"No, no – none at all" she shook her head slightly "I must admit I was a little concerned that you might not want me to finish my education."

He exhaled slightly as if annoyed "I value education highly and I have absolutely no intention of _making you_ quit Hogwarts." And he added slyly, "Especially as your two best subjects are Potions and Defense Against the Dark Arts."

Lily snapped her head up "You have been investigating me?" she queried surprised.

"As you have been investigating me." he snapped back quickly.

Lily flushed and looked down at her hands feeling a little awkward.

There was a slight pause and Lily ventured one more question that had been nagging at her for a long time.

"There is one more question…" she shifted uncomfortably in her chair, unsure how to phrase her question and so stood up pacing the room a little.

"Yes, go on" he replied watching the flush creep up her chest and neck to her face – he felt a wave of desire flood through him – yes she was going to be quite a pleasing wife.

"Well – um do you – are you wanting to ahh – um consummate our marriage – it's just I'm not sure I'm prepared for that kind of closeness yet…." She trailed off looking closely to see his reaction.

He stood up and came to stand very close to her. He was scowling slightly his black eyes glittering at her "Lily I have no intention of taking an unwilling wife into my bed – rape is not something I aspire to." He finished severely.

Lily looked startled at his words but was also somewhat relieved – she turned a little pink again and was a little uneasy.

Severus felt somewhat spurned and a little angered - she obviously found him repulsive.

Snape stepped away from her and said indifferently.

"Lily I will communicate with you in due course to finalize arrangements – right now I have other business I have to attend to." He bowed his head slightly and disapparated out of the room with a loud crack.

Lily suddenly felt chilly and a little alone. There were so many other things she wanted to ask him and she felt a little unsatisfied – on a number of different levels.

It was a full three weeks later, the day before Micklemass Eve, that Severus contacted her via his owl – a large black owl with yellow eyes. The parchment read;

_I have made arrangements for our marriage. It will take place tomorrow on the eve of Micklemass at 10:00am. Your parents will be present and an associate of mine Professor Filius Flitwick. I have asked your father to move your belongings to my residence and have enclosed a Portkey so you can meet me there at 2:00pm today._

_S. Snape_

Such a formal indifferent letter about such life changing events – marriage – moving out of her family home… she was suddenly full of fears and apprehension and her mind whirred and spun so that she could not eat or relax.

The old grandfather clock chimed 2:00pm and she took hold of the Portkey – the room spun and whirled and she felt that familiar whoosh of being transported.

She landed with a small pop inside a medium sized room full of books and parchments. There was an enormous desk in front of the large bay window and several mismatched pieces of furniture placed about the room. She nodded in satisfaction - it looked, by all appearances, a homely and comfortable space.

Lily moved to look outside the window which faced onto a large traditional English garden, slightly overgrown, and further on to beautiful green fields and woodlands. She sighed in approval, it was just the sort of view and garden she loved.

Today, she was wearing a dark green Elizabethan bodice laced at the back, a white open sleeved blouse and full three quarter length black velvet skirt. Her hair was styled up in her usual fashion, although a few curls had escaped during her transport to his place via the Portkey.

A sound came from the door and she turned to see it open and Severus walked in wearing his usual cold demeanor and black clothes. She felt her heart leap in her chest and tried to keep herself from fidgeting.

"Would you like some Elf-wine?" he asked civilly walking over to the side board.

"Yes please" she replied, trying to think of something to say. Nerves fluttered in her stomach and chest and she smoothed her hands down over her dress in an attempt to calm herself, trying to breathe deeply, which was difficult to do in the tight bodice.

Severus watched her as he poured the wine and felt that familiar surge of blood as he watched her chest rise and fall, but he squashed those feelings – he was not going to let this woman turn him into a lovesick idiot.

Handing her the wine glass he asked "I hope you don't disapprove of my moving your belongings here. But as we will be married tomorrow, I thought it - appropriate."

Lily took a delicate sip from her glass and placed it on the nearest table to her. Deciding to be brave she ventured a little conversation.

"Will you give me a tour of your house and gardens – the garden looks lovely outside?" she asked politely.

"Yes of course." He replied coldly

He proceeded to take her on a tour of his house which was a large Tudor house – she colored a little when he showed her the master bedroom with its large king sized four poster bed. She noticed her dresser had been placed near the large window to afford it the best light and view and she felt a little warmth towards him for his thoughtfulness.

They continued on out into the garden where she was delighted. They talked very little as he was disinterested and aloof – affording her the time only out of a sense of civility. However, he did take the time to notice that she seemed an intelligent, sensible girl he could not have tolerated a brainless nitwit.

It was very soon supper time and Lily was feeling a little hungry. She asked if she could see the kitchen – perhaps she could make dinner depending on what was stocked in the larder.

He was not a domesticated person and mainly ate at Hogwarts or at an Inn; however, he had enough in the kitchen to prepare a basic meal.

He sat at the large kitchen table watching her as she busied herself discovering where everything was.

Lily ventured to make a little conversation trying to break the wall of aloofness that he seemed to permanently have up.

"I enjoy cooking – my mother is a terrible cook and we would have all starved if it hadn't been for my father and me taking on that task." She said lightly casting a spell to break and beat the eggs into a bowl.

"How does Beef Wellington, beans, carrots and apple strudel for dessert sound?" she asked trying to gain an insight into his tastes.

He looked bored and disinterested and she felt a wave of anxiety flood through her body. "Fine." He replied coolly.

"Good" she replied briskly.

Severus sighed and decided to try to be a little interested "I believe you are an outstanding excellent musician and have an exceptional voice?" he asked as he was a little curious about this side of her.

"Actually, I much prefer to compose the music for others to perform than myself." She paused "However, I do like to play and sing - but just not in front of people."

"Why not – my understanding is that you _Potters_ crave attention and accolades?" he asked a little sarcastically.

She stiffened her back a little but did not rise to the bait – she knew he was referring to the desire her grandfather, father and brother all had of being the Seekers and Captains of the Gryffindor Quidditch Team. Especially her older brother James, who loved the popularity he received by being the son of the famous Harry Potter who had killed Lord Voldemort.

"Well not all _Potters_ seek the limelight – my older brother James certainly has enough _attention and accolades_ to keep him popular for many generations to come – but Albus and I are more reserved like our grandmother, Lily, whom I am named after and said to be much like – you knew her I think?" she added slyly looking at him.

He ignored her question and she sat down a little unsatisfied to pick at her meal – her appetite gone. They sat in silence – she too scared to talk and he disinterested.

Lily's thoughts strayed to their wedding night. She was terrified – afraid to tell him that she was petrified of the thought of sex. Edmund had told her such horrific things that the thought of Severus doing these things to her made her feel nauseated. She felt trapped almost knowing it was going to be inevitable at some point. Although she reflected on their first conversation together and how he said he did not want an unwilling wife and would not rape her.

Her thoughts then strayed to her last encounter with Edmund –he had said he would do such heinous things to her for her as a "gift" for eighteenth birthday – Lily quivered involuntarily and felt like she was going to throw up, forcing the memory from her head.

Severus was the first to break the silence "I am sure you are aware that I will be taking up the post as Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher again at Hogwarts this coming year". She nodded her head indicating she was already aware of this information.

"As _you_ will be a student at Hogwarts I think it is appropriate that we keep our marriage private until you have finished your final year." "It may cause…" he paused "…difficulties for both of us."

He leaned a little closer to her searching her face as she blushed and looked at him "I trust you can be discreet – not even your brothers, Aunts, Uncles and cousins will know. Only your father, mother, Professor Flitwick and the half giant Hagrid will know." He said to her making it clear she understood.

"Yes, I understand." She replied croakily.

"Good – I hope you will be a diligent and conscientious student of mine Lily." he replied trying to break a little of the ice that had formed between them - he stood up to move away from the table.

Lily decided to venture a little daring humor and after a pause asked him "As your wife will I get extra credits in your classes?"

She glanced up and him and he looked down at her with a severe look on his face "Don't be silly." He said tersely.

Feeling a little embarrassed she looked down and mumbled "Sorry just a silly joke." Playing with her skirt (again).

He went on coldly "You should get some sleep as it is our wedding day tomorrow."

He moved away towards the door "I will be sleeping in the guest room tonight and you may sleep in the Master Suite…goodnight." And he walked out of the kitchen.

Lily sat at the table for a while going over their conversations (or rather the lack of them).

She stood up and waved her wand to clear the dirty dishes and clean the kitchen for the morning. One thing she had been told is that he was a difficult person to get to know. Very true she thought and wandered up the staircase to the master suite.

She noticed a fire was crackling away in the fireplace – _Severus must have started the fire _she thought feeling a little pleased at his consideration of her.

She took her clothes off and draped them over large padded chair. She pulled out a long deep forest green sleeveless nightdress that had small silver ribbons to lace the front of the high empire line top. _Funny_ she thought and she fingered the soft material and slipped it on – _I have always liked green and silver… Slytherin colours._

Lily had always found her mothers bright taste (so similar to her grandmother Molly's) too much for her – preferring darker, more subdued colours like forest greens, black, pewter, deep crimsons and purples. So different from the gelds, rich reds, oranges and even pinks (she grimaced) of her family home.

She found the master bedroom just to her satisfaction with its' deep colours, dark woods and heavy drapes.

Lily surveyed the room around her and her eyes fell on the large four poster bed – the marital bed – she felt a lurch in her stomach and shivered in anticipation, a mixture of fear and nervousness.

She sighed – stretched and yawned, feeling tiredness wash over her so climbed in and was soon very fast asleep.

Sometime in the early hours of the morning she woke up needing to go to the bathroom and padded across to the ensuite bathroom. _Hmmm nice_ she nodded again in approval at the rich woods and deep green colours – eyeing the large standalone old fashioned bathtub and looking forward to the time when she could have a long relaxing soak inside it.

She came out and wandered over to climb back into the bed. That's when she heard it – a yell. Lily walked to the door of the bedroom and opened it a fraction to listen. Sure enough she heard it again coming from the room next door – a shout followed by muffled moans.

Curiosity got the better of her and she quietly tiptoed down the hallway to the door where she could hear the sounds coming from. Placing her ear to the door she could hear Severus moaning "No.…" Lily bit her bottom lip wrestling whether or not to enter.

Her concern won and she slowly turned the door knob opening the door slightly, peeking into the room from around the door.

In the firelight she could see him thrashing around slightly, sweating with a look of pain over his face, mumbling something - he was wearing a grey loose shirt open at the front to his navel.

She opened the door more and stepped into the door way still holding the door knob. He groaned loudly and gave a shout "NO!" Lily jumped and realized he was still asleep not shouting at her.

"Severus - are you all right?" she said in a low voice. He muttered something unintelligible then gave another shout "STOP!"

She spoke a little louder "Severus – are you all right?"

His eyes flew open, he sat up quickly instantly awake and alert yelling "Accio wand!" catching his wand with his outstretched hand and pointing it at her with a very dangerous look on his face.

Lily was rooted to the spot expecting to be shot with a cursing spell looking wide eyed and terrified.

He lowered his wand still looking dangerous and spat at her "What are you doing!"

She flushed deeply, her knees becoming weak and her stomach pitching. She swallowed hard, her breathing becoming shallow as she croaked out "I-I heard…" she took a gulp "I-I heard you shout…and-and I was worried." She stammered out.

He looked livid and hissed out through clenched teeth "_Get out_!"

The colour drained from Lily's face as she felt her being propelled out the door of his room and the door slam in her face. She stumbled backwards and fell onto her bum with an "Oomph".

Tears prickled behind her eyes as she slowly got up from the floor and walked quietly back to her room wrapping her arms protectively around her body - telling herself _Stupid, stupid, STUPID girl – Oh no! don't cry, don't cry!_

But she couldn't help it as she crawled back into that large bed she buried her face into her pillow and cried - large sobs wracking her body. Hating herself for being so foolish as to try to care.

Severus groaned as he fell back onto his pillows – wiping a hand across his damp brow. _What was she thinking coming into my room in the middle of the night! She's bloody lucky I didn't accidentally Avada Kedavra her!_

He remembered the look of terror and alarm on her white face as he yelled at her. He felt a twinge of regret at his actions – it was so automatic for him to react defensively, so many years of having to watch his back.

He rose from the bed and walked over to the basin of water sitting on the side board and splashed water on his face and neck, drying his face with the towel that was lying next to it. Nightmares were a common thing for Severus Snape.

He listened for any sounds coming from the room next door and whispered a hearing amplification spell "Auditio Adaugeo".

Tilting his head slightly he could hear muffled sobs coming from next door. He groaned inside, leaning his forehead against the wall that separated their rooms.

The night before their wedding and his future wife is crying because he threw her out of his room and slammed the door in her face. "Fuck" he swore softly he was angry with himself but he was angrier with her for invading his privacy.

Severus Snape went back to bed and decided that she had better start learning there were boundaries with him and she needed to grow up – life doesn't always give you what you want – life isn't fair - at all.

He turned over and went to sleep ignoring her muffled sobs.

The next day Lily opened her eyes and looked about the room a cold dread washing over her – her nerves were gnawing away at her at her impending wedding. She conjured up some food and forced it down her unwilling throat – she didn't want to go down to the kitchen, she felt nervous about meeting Severus.

She dragged herself out of bed and went to the bathroom. Lily looked at herself in the mirror; her eyes were still a little puffy from her tears. She decided a nice long soak in the bath might help relax her nerves.

Sometime later Lily emerged from her room dressed in her wedding dress. The elegant silk pewter dress complimented her skin and hair perfectly as it hugged her body. The dressed reached the floor and the neckline cut in a deep V with long flowing sleeves finished with a silver belt about the waist. She had decided to wear her hair down and place a delicate silver circlet in her hair. Lily looked like a medieval princess.

She walked down the stairs wondering where her future husband was and decided to wait in the parlor. She opened the door and found he was already there waiting for her.

He stared at her – she looked stunning, but he quickly squashed any feelings he felt surge in him. He wasn't going to lose his head over another woman.

Severus looked much the same in his usual black although his clothes looked newer and more immaculate than normal – if that could be possible.

The wedding was uneventful and formal. The bride was nervous and frightened and the groom was disinterested and remote.

However, it was good to see her father, Hagrid and to a lesser extent, her mother. Although, her mother was aloof and distant - as always. James was always her mothers' favourite and Lily seemed to be a constant disappointment. Not wanting to play Quidditch, having a passion for The Dark Arts and Potions, not enjoying flying (although that was mainly due to James putting a curse on her broom when she was eight and she ended up crashing into a tree and slicing her leg open). Then she had been sorted into Slytherin and said she wanted to remain there even with her mothers protests – this was the last straw for Ginny Potter, who just found her daughter an utter frustration.

When they arrived back at their house neither of them spoke although she did try a little conversation but he shut her down and said he was due early tomorrow at Hogwarts and retired to his room.

He never tried to visit her in the night.

Chap 2

Lily walked slowly down the stairs her mind dwelling on her loveless empty marriage. Even though they had been married for several months now, Lily knew little of Severus Snape.

She new very little of his history with her grandparents and her father, but given his apparent dislike of her she guessed it was not good.

She had tried to break through his barriers but was met with either coldness or hostility. She agonized how to approach discussion with her husband – she did not want to live like this.

There was a cold gnawing empty feeling that enveloped her soul and numbness was constantly washing over her in huge engulfing waves. Lily had moments where she just felt like the walking dead.

She remembered the last time she spoken to her husband and how he had looked at her in disgust as he had disapparated out of the room back to Hogwarts – a senior staff meeting apparently. She wasn't to start her final year there for another month or so.

Lily couldn't live like this any longer. It had been several months since their arranged marriage and although she was committed to trying to make this union work – he wasn't. What madness had possessed father to promise her to a man like Severus Snape!

She heard rumors and whispers about him. Stories that he had mysteriously disappeared into the Black Forest after Voldemort had killed him and had remained there not aging, suspended in time learning all sorts of strange and secretive mysteries.

When he had come back some fifteen years later he apparently went straight to visit her father. She never knew the exact content of their conversation but soon learned afterwards that when she came of age as a witch she would marry the dark and impenetrable Severus Snape.

Being a witch that valued traditional beliefs and trusting her father she had consented to the marriage. Naively she had also hoped it would get her further away from her old tormenter, Edmund. But, looking back now, it seemed she had gone from the cauldron into the fire – from one tyrant straight to another – could life get any crueler? She felt the strain of her desperately unhappy life eating away at her heart.

He was not a physically abusive or threatening man but just dismissive, cold and bitter. She could see and hear the intense dislike he had for her family, which - unfortunately for Lily, included her.

She had to try though – try hard to break through his defenses – try hard to find some amicable ground – try hard to help him overcome his loathing of her at least enough for him to be civil to her for two minutes.

Inwardly she wrestled with herself – one part saying she was going to lose and just give up and dive into oblivion – the other saying don't give up… have a little hope.

Severus was in the front room of their modest two storey Tudor house sitting on the settee reading parchments. Lily placed her forehead on the door, and held her hand on the door knob, composing herself – finding strength for whatever might happen. She straightened her back, gently knocked on the large dark door and walked in.

He did not look up at her or acknowledge her presence in any way.

She shuffled her feet for a moment trying to find the courage to speak. After a moment she spoke nervously.

"Severus, I would like a moment of your time to talk to you." She ventured, feeling her stomach pitch and roll with anxiety.

He looked up from his papers and looked annoyed "If you must." he said coldly not putting his papers down.

She sat down on the settee one space away from him and faced him – her legs felt shaky and she was glad to sit down. Smoothing at her skirt (that nervous habit she had) – she was trying to find the nerve to say what she wanted to say and inside was desperately afraid of his response.

After a pause he sighed irritably and said sharply "Today sometime if you please Potter – as you can no doubt see I am busy." He still referred to her as Potter when she had irritated him and very occasionally he called her Lily. It was clear he did not regard her as Mrs Lily Snape at all.

She jumped and swallowed looking down at her hands too afraid to look at his face.

"Severus – as you know this marriage was arranged between yourself and my father…" She paused looking at his face which was cold and unreadable.

"I know very little of your history with my family but I have pretty much figured out that you have a strong dislike of my family which would appear to also include me". Lily looked for his response. Severus just looked irritated but did nothing to reassure her on that point.

"But I am your wife…" she choked out "I don't want to spend all of our married life with a husband that hates and despises me." His face was like stone. "I want this marriage to work – I want _us_ to work – will you not try just a little…" she trailed off feeling hopeless.

"I don't despise you Lily." he said unfeelingly and went back to looking at his papers.

"Then why do you treat me with such contempt?" she asked in disbelief.

"I don't" he replied dismissively still looking at his papers.

"Yes you _do_." She replied a little forcefully – his head snapped up and he looked dangerous "Do you think I am blind?" she rushed on deciding she had nothing to lose. "I see the sneers, the expression of disgust and loathing in your eyes when you look at me – I hear the comments the veiled taunts…!"

He stood up and faced her looking dark and very, very angry "Stop it Lily!"

She stopped and could feel the tears welling in her eyes.

"Oh don't start the tears" he replied with a sneer "You Potters you were always weak – there is a time to grow up Lily so you had better start." He said severely "Life isn't fair and it doesn't always deliver what you want – stop the self-pity."

She felt faint. Her worst fears were being realised – he did loathe her. But she had started this now and she was going to see it through.

"You think I don't know life doesn't always work out the way you want?" She replied a little shrilly "I've gone from suffering the taunts of one tyrant and his cronies straight to another who happens to be my _husband_!" she spat – He looked closely at her and the fact that she had let slip a little secret.

She stood up to face him, several inches shorter than his six foot frame - Lily could feel her heart thumping in her chest "You want to hurt me you go ahead! But if you think I'll endure _this life_ your sadly mistaken – I would rather Avada Kedavra myself than die _this_ slow and painful death!" she finished emotionally.

"You Potters – always dramatic – well Lily what do you want from me?!" He was truly angry now – her words had stung him.

"I want _you_" she pointed at him "to _love me_ and _I_" she balled her hand into a fist and placed it on her chest "want to _love you._" she said heatedly.

She expected him to look livid - but he didn't. He just looked shocked.

He couldn't speak – emotions whirled through him. He honestly thought she despised him for trapping her in this marriage. He had thought she would eventually come to him to ask to be released.

She was right he had provoked, ignored and dismissed her – he had pushed her to the limits, convincing himself that she would never want him.

But hearing she was dedicated for them to make it work. His mind was thinking a million thoughts at once and he was trying to sort through it all – her declaration had thrown everything into chaos.

There was a long pause where he seemed to wrestling with some inner demons "Damn it Severus – _say something_." She asked desperately.

He sat down into the nearest armchair and placed his head in his hands feeling a little raw and emotional.

She fell to her knees in front of him and pulled his hands from his face with hers, grasping them in hers. It was the first time either of them had touched physically. Part of her was struck by the warmth and strength of his hands with his long elegant fingers. He kept his head bowed.

"Please _look at me_." She whispered hoarsely.

He looked at her "I don't despise you Lily – I have hated your family, yes." He paused looking at her searching her face for any hint that she wasn't being honest with him – detecting only sincerity he continued "Please believe me when I say that I don't hate you."

She let out a small sigh "Severus – I am not Lily Potter any more I am Mrs Lily Snape." He looked away his mind trying to find the right words. He did not try to take his hands away from hers but felt a small squeeze and he bought his eyes back to her beautiful green ones, so like her grandmothers.

"Can you look me in the eyes and honestly tell me you want us to live like this?" She continued trying to force him to face their marriage "Is this…" she stopped trying to calm herself "…is this, what you want?" she asked.

He was no coward but this was new territory for him and he didn't know where it would lead him. Above all Severus Snape liked to control his destiny. Hate was easy for him – but love – he was trying to avoid it – it all just lead to pain in the end.

He looked into her eyes again and could see the honesty and sincerity – she didn't hate him. He knew enough of her nature to know that she was going out on a limb at this point and how they moved forward at this point was entirely up to him.

Time and life experience had taught Severus Snape to be a very self-controlled and detached man. So much of his life was spent serving others, having people think the worst of him, having people that loved him, turn and hate him. The truth was, he was tired of being hated, tired of being feared and most of all he was tired of being alone.

"Severus…?" she asked tentatively as he had not responded to her question.

He sighed heavily "Lily – I am not a man that enjoys discussing his emotions," he stopped, finding the right words "I do not find it easy to trust people or to let them into my confidence."

He continued looking into her face – reading her "However, I do not desire a cold and acrimonious marriage based on distrust and old grievances and so the answer is yes - I am prepared to try."

He continued with the ghost of a smile on his face and a little of the hardness in his eyes gone "But I may need some guidance and understanding as I am not accustomed to having…a wife."

Lily breathed a little in relief, feeling like a weight was starting to lift off her and reassured him "Severus – I am not demanding the greatest love story of our decade, all I am asking is some civility, understanding, mutual respect and maybe try to find some common ground – does this sound like a good starting point?" she asked him with a small smile.

Still holding her hands he in turn squeezed them – taking the initiative to give her some comfort of his commitment "Yes Lily I agree - that is a very good starting point."

Her nature was more open than his and she couldn't help but wrap her arms around his neck and hug him, whispering to him a small "Thank you." He was pleasantly surprised and not unhappy.

The next few weeks that followed were (much to their surprise and delight) very enjoyable. They went for walks and sat talking about a variety of subjects, finding that they had very similar interests and he promised to help her learn to fly – reassuring her that she would not fall off with his guidance.

Lily found she trusted him, and she enjoyed his self-assured strong nature – it made her feel protected. He found she was modest, honest and open with him – not at all like her paternal side.

Their personalities were far more complimentary than they had expected and they found it very easy to get to an agreeable and harmonious point in their relationship.

Chap 3

There was only one other delicate issue that Lily was hoping to discuss with her husband and that was her grandmother. Part of her nagged away saying that he didn't really want her but he actually wanted Lily Evans and that she was somehow a second-best consolation prize.

She knew very little of the history of her grandmother and Severus and her father would not say much at all on the subject when questioned. She was, however, curious to see his reaction and to gain some insight.

Agonizing over which approach was best she ultimately decided on the direct approach. She asked him "Did you know I was named after my grandmother, Lily Evans, – you knew her I think?"

He started a little and gave her a hard look. So she knew a little of his history with Lily Evans – just how much he thought, faintly irritated.

"Yes I knew her." He added nothing more.

Lily couldn't help herself she wanted to know more "…and am I like her?" she asked openly.

He hissed inside, not feeling comfortable speaking about Lily Evans to her granddaughter.

"In some ways." He added nothing more but his eyes flashed a warning to her.

Lily was unperturbed and a little annoyed that he was not forthcoming about someone that had obviously been important in his life. Especially as it was _her grandmother_ and she was _his wife_!

"I have her eyes but that is all I know – tell me Severus do I have her hair, or figure...or mouth?" She was not going to let this go "Or perhaps her smile, or character? Surely you remember something?" she added trying to provoke him to speak about her.

"Enough Lily!" he hissed at her and stood up facing her.

She instantly acquiesced, suddenly deciding it wasn't wise to incite his temper. "I'm sorry" she whispered dropping her head slightly.

"It wasn't my intention to aggravate you – I won't bring the subject up again." Lily turned away and started to clear the meal from the table.

The anger flickered away from Sevres's face and he sat down - she could tell by his demeanor that he did not want to discuss anything.

Lily's mind was buzzing with so many things but she had to push forward – even if it meant a step backwards – she had to take that risk.

After a few seconds of uncomfortable silence she continued "It's just" she struggled to find the right words "… I don't want my husband to be constantly comparing and measuring me against the ghost of my grandmother."

He regarded her seriously and she continued a little more forcefully "I have enough of that from my own family AND every one else that knows my family." She shrugged a little dropping her hand to smooth at her dress – that little habit she had when she felt nervous or upset about something. Severus had already observed it.

Ultimately he wanted an honest relationship with her with no secrets (or very few), so in order to do that he also had to be to be honest with her. She had been honest with him so far and so decided maybe he should take a step forward as well.

He felt a little uncomfortable as he was not accustomed to talking about his thoughts or feelings, however, he was NO coward and he certainly wasn't going to back away now.

He stood up to look down at her bent head watching her clearing the dishes away from the table. "Lily – I cannot deny that part of me felt something towards you because of your grandmother. But you are also quite different from her in so many ways."

He stepped towards her and touched one of her curls that had escaped her tight bun "Yes, your hair is the same colour but you have such lovely curls" He threaded her hair through his long fingers and continued.

"You know you should wear your hair down – it's quite - beautiful." He picked up his wand that had been laying on the table and her hair freed itself from its bindings, flowing over her shoulders and down her back, glowing in the half light of dusk. "Much better." he murmured.

She turned to him and looked up into his dark eyes – hoping to show him that she was sincere about her willingness to be open with him.

He found that once he had started it wasn't so difficult and seeing her with her hair down looking so lovely spurred him on more.

"You asked about her figure – well she was taller than you and very slight..." he stepped closer and placed a hand on her hip "but one thing I know is that your mouth makes me think sinful thoughts that I never felt with her" he placed his other hand on her other hip and pulled her gently forward so she was pressed against him – his black eyes glittered desire "…and _your _body drives me to distraction that _no other woman_ has ever made me feel." She didn't move and felt completely intoxicated by his soft seduction of her.

He couldn't resist her any further and pulled her into his arms and pressed his mouth on hers in a gentle kiss. Lily was surprised by his kiss and initially was too astonished to react…but after a few seconds had found it was not an unpleasant feeling…in fact quite the opposite.

He was so very gentle with her and she found she trusted he would not hurt her. Of all her enquiries trying to find out something of his character one thing came up again and again – this man could be trusted _and_ he was a man of his word.

She felt a flutter in her stomach when he whispered her name and wanted to explore these new sensations further. When he groaned she felt her heart thump in her chest and her body starting to feel warm and responsive to his touch.

She was unsure at first as it was new territory for her but after a while she let out a small moan, wrapping her arms around him and embraced him in return, opening her mouth to let him explore her as he wished.

Her response was enough for Severus and his normal restraint was nearly diminished – he ached and throbbed for her.

He moved his hands from her hips and lifted her onto the kitchen table, taking the opportunity to move between her legs and pull her hips closer so they were pressing against his.

She could feel his hard arousal against her - her eyes flew open and she abruptly jerked away breaking from the kiss, looking up at him – panic and alarm written all over her face. "I'm sorry - I can't – I can't do this."

He frowned slightly and then the cold mask instantly came down over his face. He stepped away from her and gave her an indifferent look, adding acidly "Let me know when your ready to overcome your revulsion of me Lily."

He was angry and he felt rejected. He stepped away from her and left the room abruptly. She felt the cold envelope her and shivered already missing his body warmth.

She had to explain to him her fears – she had to make him understand that she did not find him repulsive at all. That she was an inexperienced fearful girl and she needed him to be understanding.

Lily followed him and found him in the parlor where he looked up at her from his desk and arched an eyebrow saying coldly "Yes – what is it?"

"…I – I don't find you repulsive at all" she whispered quietly looking up into his dark eyes willing him to understand "It's just…" she tried to find the words to help him understand what she felt – the last thing she wanted to do was have him feel rejected, as she herself had felt so many times before by the ones that should care for her.

"It's just… I don't have much experience with that sort of thing and … I-I am… frightened." She finished honestly.

Snape groaned inside, her honesty and innocence (and beauty) was stirring such powerful emotions in him.

He had been alone for such a long time – he felt it keenly being this close to her – Merlin he wanted her - badly! Right from the first time he saw her several months ago sitting so quietly under the large oak tree surrounded by books, reading and taking notes. She was very like him in the way that she preferred to be alone and was disinterested in all usual teenage idiocy that surrounded her.

The last thing he wanted to do right now was to frighten her and so he said seriously.

"Lily – I am not a man that is easy to know and you have probably heard things about me that might cause you to be…concerned." He finished darkly.

She shuffled a little and instinctively looked towards his left forearm where his Death Eater mark would probably be still imprinted on his arm.

"Your father would not have consented to our marriage if he thought I would harm you – _trust me_ when I tell you that I have no intention of hurting you. As my wife you will under my protection and care. I will not harm you - or allow anyone else to harm you."

After a short pause he added dryly "Although I do not think I could tolerate infidelity."

Lily digested his words and her heart leapt in her chest at his commitment to her - he would care and _protect_ her. So many years of having Edmund, James and his followers tease, harass, humiliate and intimidate her and having no one believe her – or just turn a blind eye instead.

She felt an overwhelming sense of relief! How could it be that this man Severus Snape would safeguard her when her own family and circle could, or would, not. Lily felt a lightness on her heart and a dark pressure start to lift off her at his words. Hope at last for a life of peace and contentment!

Lily looked into his eyes intensely searching for the truth. "Do you promise me this – that you _will protect me_ from all others that seek to do me harm?" she whispered hoarsely.

She could not help it – she so desperately needed someone to watch over her – she was so drained and tired from have to watch all dark corners day and night never knowing when that bastard Edmund might strike and she felt concern eating at her knowing her return to Hogwarts was next week.

Severus was surprised by her reaction and more than a little suspicious at her words. But now was not the appropriate time to probe her – he was an intuitive, intelligent man and given her openness he pretty much guessed from her words that someone, or something, was causing her some trouble that she needed protecting from. He felt a rage stir in his chest at someone hurting her.

"Yes Lily I promise – always." He replied forcefully.

Lily sighed in relief and acting out of pure impulsiveness (not something she often did) threw her arms around Severus's neck and hugged him close.

There was some part of her mind admitted that she enjoyed his hard maleness and powerful aura - she knew Edmund would be no match for this man!

Snape was caught completely off guard at her reaction and had to take a step back, grabbing her around the waist which in turn lifted her off her feet as she threw herself at him.

"LILY! I thought you wanted to take time for that next step in our relationship – it would seem it is a _very_ short step." He said slightly amused.

She muffled into his neck something he could not make out. Hellfire she felt good - he was struggling to keep his desire under control. He could feel his guard slipping.

Knowing now that she wasn't repulsed by him but just nervous he felt encouraged by her actions and he again bent his head to gently touch her lips with his caressing her so very softly – wanting her to open up more to him.

She could feel that new quivering sensation in her stomach and the pulsing throb between her legs growing stronger as he released her mouth and trailed light feathery kisses along her jaw line down her neck and across her shoulder. _Merlin's Balls!_ She thought _That feels amazing!_ She wiggled a little and tilted her head back slightly to give him better access to her throat. She was sure she saw a hint of a smile play across on his lips at her actions, but didn't care…after all he was her husband …and … it just felt so good!

Snape interpreted her actions as agreeable to what he was doing (beside the fact that she wasn't complaining) and he could also feel her pulse fluttering away under his lips.

He thought of all the things he wanted to do with her and was now in an awkward situation of being harder than he had ever been before - he felt like he was going to explode!

_Get control of this Severus! _He hissed to himself but when she wiggled and tilted her head back to give him better access he felt his restraint slip more and, whilst kissing her throat, so very gently stroked his fingers over her nipple feeling her arousal.

Lily bucked a little but couldn't help herself and moaned his name "…Severus…" pressing her breast into his hand a little. _Stars that feels good…oh God what would it feel like if he kissed my breasts!_ Lily felt a tightness further down and moaned again loudly as he took her nipple in his mouth, sucking it through her blouse.

_Fuck!_ He thought when she said his name and squirmed in pleasure _She is so fucking responsive to the smallest touch!_ So he decided to raise the bar again and pulled her blouse down to take her naked breast in his mouth – teasing her nipple with his tongue, sucking softly which made her moan and move her hands to his shoulders, digging her nails in, encouraging him more.

It was at this moment a roar came from the fireplace and the voice of the Headmistress of Hogwarts, Minerva McGonagall, spoke. "Severus – your urgent presence is required at Hogwarts – we have a situation here that needs your expertise."

Snape swore and looked absolutely livid at being interrupted. He very slowly let Lily slide down his body, giving her time to adjust her blouse, and turned her around pulling her close into his body so she could feel his arousal again her.

Lily slowly lifted her head to gaze into his face – the look in his eyes so dark and intense – was it one of warmth? It was so fleeting it was difficult to know.

Tenderness was something that Severus Snape very rarely ever showed anyone. How is it that this young woman could undo him like this so quickly? Loneliness can do that….

"I will be there shortly" he replied coolly.

"Very well." And with a flash of flames and a crackling sound McGonagall was gone.

"What appalling timing?" Snape drawled slightly frustrated at the interruption.

Lily just stood there and looked very flushed and slightly bewildered – not so much at the interruption but more at the hard feel of him pressing into her back and was lost in her thoughts of what she had just experienced and what might have happened if they hadn't been disturbed.

He turned to her and bent his head to kiss her briefly on the mouth, then turned and touched the Portkey to Hogwarts and with a whoosh had disappeared.

Lily sighed and wrapped her arms around herself – much preferring the warm strong feel of his arms.

She decided to go to bed and wandered up the staircase her stomach full of butterflies and her body throbbing with need when she thought about touch and his kisses. But when thoughts strayed to them making love her stomach lurched and fear gripped her. Her last thoughts before she fell into a deep slumber were of how to tell him of her fears and not sure how he would react.

Chap 4

Severus arrived back sometime early hours of the morning feeling drained at the effort of having to mix the appropriate complicated potion to deal with a werewolf problem at Hogwarts. He instantly thought of Lily.

She had responded enthusiastically to his caresses and the normally patient man was very impatient to see her.

Walking towards the door of the master bedroom he knocked lightly and opened it without hesitation.

He stopped at the foot of the bed and looked down at her sleeping body her beautiful hair flowing down her back. He felt a small burning hole pierce his heart as he watched her – she was unaware of his presence.

"Lily…" he spoke softly moving to the side of the bed nearest to her.

Severus also couldn't help but notice appreciatively the dark green nightdress with its' silver laces and trim, clinging to her body was highlighting her lovely curves.

_Hmm Slytherin colours – exquisite on her_ he thought wickedly.

She groaned a little, blinked her eyes open and said his name huskily "…Severus?"

He looked at her face, her beautiful green eyes, full red lips and cheeks tinged with pink. Rarely lost for words all he could do was just stare at her and feel overwhelmed by the emotions stirring in him.

Lily looked at him and watched him trying to control his emotions.

They looked at each other for quite sometime. Now that he was here he wasn't so sure he should have come in and he spoke "Sorry to wake you – it's been a horrendous night."

She sat up and looked concerned "Nothing too serious I hope?" Not wanting to probe too much.

"Nothing that I couldn't cope with…" he sighed deeply "Just a little fatigued that's all." He replied wearily "…and I just wanted to see you…" he trailed off feeling self-conscious about being in her room uninvited and waking her from her sleep. He looked a little stiff and said formally "My apologies again for waking you." And he turned away.

She reached out to take hold of his hand. The contact felt like fire through his blood and he looked down at her masking his emotions.

"Severus please wait" she whispered tugging on his hand to pull him down to sit on the bed. She slowly sat up facing him. She looked like she wanted to say something.

She began "Severus – there is something that I want to ask you…" she paused fidgeting, having some difficulty trying to find the right words.

"Yes – go on." He pressed her – curious as to where this was going.

"I-I really enjoyed our kisses earlier" she blushed prettily and he felt his bulge grow harder as he remembered.

She continued nervously "But I do not know a great deal at all about what goes on… physically - between a man and a woman – a husband and a wife…" she paused struggling a little "but I have been told that it is a truly painful experience… and that a woman is literally forced apart, tearing her body …" she choked out feeling horrified and looked down at her shaking hands to afraid to face him.

If she had had the courage to look at his face she would have seen the look of shock and horror cross his face.

Of all the things he thought she might say he would never have guessed this one in a thousand years! _What little goat fucker filled her head full of this rubbish!_ Severus thought – he was livid and he was going to find the little bastard responsible for this and hang him by his balls. At least now he knew what he was dealing with and better understood her initial reaction earlier on.

She heard him exhale loudly, hissing slightly "Lily – I don't know who has told you this – it is obviously some kind of sick joke – but I can categorically tell you that sex is nothing at all like it has been described to you."

He went on "Do you think your father would do that to your mother?" he forced her to think logically "Or Uncles to your Aunts?" "No Lily of course not – and I will _never do that to you_." He finished vehemently.

Severus sighed, wiped a hand over his brow, raising an eyebrow and could not help but feel slightly stunned at now having to explain the "facts of life" to his soon-to-be wife. He sighed deeply and spent the next little while talking to her explaining things and then answering her shy questions.

When she (and he) were satisfied he ventured a question "May I ask Lily – who was it that told you this nonsense?"

She squirmed uncomfortably and said "Perhaps you should see for yourself…?" Giving him permission to use the Legilimency spell on her.

He looked gravely at her "Are you certain?" he wanted to make sure she understood that there would be no hiding from him "Do you understand what you are asking me?" he asked her.

She stared into his eyes wanting him to understand "Yes… Severus – I don't want this barrier between us and this… this is a barrier that I want to break down." She added forcefully.

"Very well" he replied.

He was a master of the Legilimency spell and Severus was immediately transported to her last memory with Edmund where he stood by and watched the older boy terrify and threaten her.

Severus pushed her harder to reveal everything to him and was exposed to all the tormenting and humiliation she had suffered at the hands of this Edmund and, to a much lesser extent, her brother James.

He was so deep in her memories that it was only her moaning "Please Severus… enough…" that bought him back to the current world and he snapped out of her mind.

He felt such a rage in his chest and he wanted to obliterate those responsible. He too knew the pain and humiliation of bullying – but he had not suffered like her. She had a far more menacing and malevolent tormentor, Edmund the little fucker was going to have to deal with him now – he might not be so courageous when it wasn't a young frightened girl facing him.

He thought of the irony of their situations - he had endured bullying from her grandfather and now here she was suffering the same fate. He had underestimated her – she was much, much stronger than she appeared. He held her for sometime far too emotional to speak.

She, however, felt unshackled! All barriers had been smashed - he was her liberator! She knew now that he would safeguard her and she couldn't help but snuggle a little closer savoring his strength and maleness, a new dawning coming over her as she ran her hands across his back feeling his hardness. Her centre started to ache and throb and she could feel herself become moist at the things he had told her it could be between a man and a woman – imagining him doing these things to her.

She pulled away from him looking deeply into his black eyes and moved to kiss him. Tentatively caressing his lips with hers, tasting him, and relishing the feel of him.

"Severus…" she whispered pulling away slightly to look at him and see his reaction.

His eyes darkened and he felt hot desire pulse through him, burning and throbbing. Bending his head he down her took her mouth in a firmer more ardent embrace, pushing her a little more, but he was careful not to push her too hard – he did not want another frustrated repeat of what happened earlier.

She moaned when his hand went to her nightgown and he lightly stroked her nipples through the soft material.

Lily's kiss became a little more eager and she pressed her breast into his hand wanting more. He moved his mouth across her jaw and placed feather kisses down her neck across her collarbone, gently taking his hands and slipping the straps of her nightdress off her shoulders watching the material fall down to her waist exposing her breasts to him.

She made no complaint but just looked at him with hot desire on her face. He groaned and he dipped his head to kiss and lick one breast with his mouth and teasing and stroking the other with his hand.

She arched her back at his touch and desperately wanted to feel his skin against hers. She pulled at his jacket and shirt letting him know what she wanted "So impatient Lily" he said silkily narrowing his eyes a small smile playing on his mouth, which she soon covered with her own mouth using a spell to remove his jacket and shirt to expose his chest and shoulders.

He was pale, lean and hard. The skin of his chest bore several silver scars from past duels – she gently traced her fingers across them and bent down to kiss them her hair brushing against his skin.

She felt his hands and lips on her body encouraging and discovering all the places that made her moan and writhe in pleasure.

His hand moved slowly up her legs and gently pushed them apart, stroking the inside of her thighs. Her mind whirled and her body was reacting in ways she just couldn't control.

He very gently stroked the outside of her already wet underwear with his fingers and she instinctively rolled her hips towards him.

_Hellfire _he thought _What a witch!_ But his self-control was just about gone with her moaning and bucking at his touch. _Perhaps just a little foretaste of what is to come…_ he thought wickedly slowly removing her underwear and then very softly placing one finger inside her letting her get the sensation.

She bucked her hips and her eyes went wide looking straight at him at the new feeling she had never experienced before.

"Do you like that Lily?" he asked sexily watching her face flush and her nipples react to his gentle thrusting.

"Oh Gods Severus yes!" she moaned and tilted her head back in pleasure.

He was delighted at her reaction and it took all his willpower to stop himself from driving himself into her – she was still very inexperienced. This young witch was driving him mad and he was so rock hard that he was sure it would take several masturbations and cold showers before he would be back to normal.

"What about this?" he added lustily and replaced the one finger with two long fingers thrusting a little harder and deeper and using his thumb to further excite her. She was so tight and moist and it nearly drove him over the edge.

Lily moaned and her breathing became hard as she jerked and rolled her hips – she dug her nails into his shoulders and she fell back on the bed and let the waves of ecstasy fill her with the most unbelievable pleasure she had ever felt before. Her muscles convulsing and clenching around his fingers while he took her to a place she had never been before, calling his name out loudly as she came down from her orgasm, collapsing back on the bed.

She looked at him her face and breasts still flushed. He was smirking slightly at her tousled hair spread out over the pillows and pleasure still rippling over her face.

Lily couldn't say anything she was still reeling from all the sensations that were coursing through her body.

"I-I… that….Severus!" she finished with a moan.

He kissed her deeply and watched her as she slowly came down from her climax. After a little while she struggled to sit up and as a result her leg gently brushed against his hips and against his hard erection – she froze a little and looked at him inquisitively. Severus groaned and rolled over to sit on the edge of the bed with his back to her. At this point Lily had decided there was no turning back. Curiosity and a desire to do the same for him overwhelmed her and she slid slowly down the bed and knelt in front of him.

She looked up at him with a hot look full of desire and Severus's eyes darkened at her actions but he made no attempt to stop her. She tugged at his trousers to fully expose his throbbing hardness to her. She couldn't help but stare and marvel in wonder at his nakedness. She looked up at his intense dark eyes and whispered throatily "Show me what you want."

He took one of her hands and placed it on his shaft closing her fingers around it – showing her the right speed and pressure that excited and pleasured him. With her other hand he showed her how to fondle him making him moan her name in ecstasy and entwined his fingers through her hair thrusting his hips, encouraging her more.

She stared up into his face keeping the rhythm he had set. He looked down into her face and Lily could see his expression was intense and full of desire. She had never felt so powerful than at that moment seeing such a self-contained, impenetrable man becoming so undone. It made her feel bold and she an overwhelming desire to kiss him – watching his face closely she slowly lowered her head and placed her mouth around his tip sucking slightly. He hissed, his black eyes darkening and his jaw clenched as he released himself, swearing softly "_Fuck Lily_". She was a little startled and she felt his hands grip her shoulders and pull her up crushing her mouth under his in a heated kiss.

When he pulled away from her he pressed his forehead to hers breathing heavily – she was unsure if she had done the right thing and started to apologize.

"I'm sorry – I just got caught up…" she started.

"Don't Lily" he stopped her "– there is nothing to apologize about" he smiled slightly "you caught me by surprise – and trust me I am _not_ complaining. It would appear you have quite some natural talent." "Very fortunate for me" he added mischievously pulling her closer to him in the bed and holding her closely.

They lay together for quite a while each enjoying the feel of the other – not needing words to describe how they felt. Lily yawned and soon was fast asleep nestled closely into his long warm body. He took a little while longer to fall asleep as he wanted to watch her sleeping beside him for as long as possible.

Severus woke first and stretched lazily remembering the events of last night and turning to his side to look at the beautiful woman sleeping beside him. He took his time to memorize her face, her hair, her body – he never ever wanted to forget any detail. He soon grew very hard and thought about waking her but decided to be patient he still didn't want to rush her - perhaps he should have a cold shower instead.

He went to roll away but felt a small hand stop him. He turned to her and arched an eyebrow. She slid her hand down his arm then his hip and drew teasing circles on his navel giving him a very sexy look.

"You are a dangerous witch Lily." He replied throatily looking at her with wanton desire not disguising what he was feeling. She stole a glance downwards at his body and could see the large bulge.

She arched her eyebrows at him "I might be able to help you with that…." She said saucily lowering her hand to tease him. She felt a hungry ache grow in the very centre of her as she watched him with a look of desire on his face his erection evident. It stirred her and she pulled him a little closer to her moving her body suggestively.

"…Lily if you want to take this part of our relationship slowly you had better ask me to leave right now." He said ardently, his eyes straying to her breasts and hips wondering if she was already wet and tight.

"Severus Snape… are you thinking naughty thoughts?" she asked a little playfully, wriggling her body slightly, watching his eyes darken.

"Yes I am Mrs Lily Snape." He replied deeply arching his eyebrow.

She felt hot desire flood through her _Oh blow it – I can't send him away all frustrated can I…_

"Care to show me…" she asked with a small smile on her mouth.

"Oh yes Mrs Snape - I most definitely am going to show you." he said silkily taking her mouth with his and running his hands between her thighs parting them slowly.

She already knew enough of his nature to tell he was in no mood to tease and she herself was feeling a little impatient.

"This is what I was thinking" and he gently thrust one finger in and she moaned in pleasure, he wiggled it and teased her by only moving so very slightly. She automatically clenched around him and he was very pleased to see that she was indeed already very wet.

"Severus…._please_" She looked frustrated at his teasing because she already knew there was greater pleasure to come and she was impatient.

"So eager…" he drawled and thrust two fingers in, pumping them in and out, teasing her with his thumb. He dipped his head to suck and lick her breasts. She bucked and rolled her hips, moaning and writhing in pleasure. She started to feel that same wild lightning feeling building inside her core as he pleasured her "Severus…" she moaned his name.

Severus was rock hard and he too was feeling impatient – but he wanted to make this as pleasurable as possible for her first time.

Before she climaxed he withdrew from her and she looked bewildered by the sudden departure of his fingers.

She looked a little flushed and confused then understanding dawned on her face when he gazed down at her naked body. She was a little self-conscious and fluttered her hands to cover herself from his gaze.

"Don't…" he said gently pushing her hands away "You are truly beautiful." He said with a smile trailing his hands down her body. She literally melted before him feeling overwhelmed by him.

He pulled away from her and she looked a little shyly at his complete nakedness, openly admiring his long lean body and the hard maleness of him.

He leaned over her placing his hands either side of her head and gently kissed her, exploring her mouth and savoring her responsiveness. Using his knees he spread her legs wider and moved closer into her.

She could feel his hardness on her thigh and tensed a little – he sensed her apprehension and whispered "Wrap your legs around me and relax Lily – I won't hurt you."

She felt the tip of him at her entrance and looked into his eyes. She could only see warmth and tenderness in his dark eyes - she could get lost in those eyes forever when he looked like that at her - she felt her tenseness ease away.

He so very slowly eased into her groaning at the tightness and she cried out a little as he pushed through the last wall of her maidenhood. He stilled and gave her time to adjust to him and feeling her relax a little he slowly began to move thrusting slowly into her feeling waves of bliss come over him and she started to moan and arch against him. _Gods she is amazing!_ He yelled in his mind.

She held onto him digging her nails into his shoulders calling his name as the waves of pleasure more intense than anything ever before started taking over her body as she cried out his name her back arching.

Severus lost all control watching her breasts jerk and bounce, calling his name passionately and caught her mouth in a hard and demanding kiss and started thrusting harder and deeper into her as she shuddered and clenched around him with the intensity of her orgasm. He soon followed jerking and bucking his hips erratically as he moaned loudly releasing himself deep inside her.

He stayed inside her for sometime looking into her face watching her come down from her orgasm. He wanted to memorize everything about this moment, savoring her, loving her.

He rolled away from her, but soon caught her up in his arms pulling her into him, resting his chin on top of her head, gently stroking her back.

"Well…" he murmured softly into her hair "So much for taking it slow."


	2. Chapter 2

The few weeks that Lily and Severus had before the official start of the Hogwarts year, were like a wondrous quest of discovery between two souls. It consisted of frequent, sometimes passionate - sometimes tender, lovemaking. Intimate walks and conversations, enthralling (and one erotic) flights on a broom – although, only with persistent encouragement from Severus did she finally consent to overcome her fear and only on the condition that she flew with him and not alone.

Who knew that two people could achieve such a profound connection – they were in their own world and nothing existed beyond its secretive enchanted walls.

A new dawn of understanding and love was emerging. He – learning to love and learning to trust. She – growing in confidence and learning a new strength and power she did not think she had.

They soon realised that the divination that was done at her birth was the same as the one at his birth. Like so many prophecies, interpretations were often incorrect - what he failed to realise in his youth he now realised as a mature adult. That is that Lily Evans, Lily Potter's grandmother, was not the Lily meant for him but that her child would bear the Lily, "the white flower", destined for him.

The foretelling was told by Luna Lovegoods' grandmother and was recorded as this;

"A dark boy shall rise and fall to death – he shall rise again seeking the chosen one – he shall give him his white flower and she shall be his guide to peace and love. She shall endure great pain but he shall be her salvation."

The first day of a new year at Hogwarts came too quickly for both Severus and Lily and they each prepared themselves that morning in mutual silence. He was feeling irritated and surly – having to teach his wife in Dark Arts and also be her Slytherin House Master, pretending she did not exist in his world, was going to be complicated and frustrating – he did not want to refer to her as "Miss Potter" as he now regarded her very much as _his_ "Mrs Snape". And to make matters worse this weekend he had to attend a ridiculous induction for the new Professors starting at Hogwarts this year – what a waste of time.

Lily was feeling anxious. The main cause of her anxiety was the fact that she was going to have to deal with Edmund. He was now going to be a Junior Professor teaching First Years how to fly. Lily felt tightness in her stomach when she thought about the last time she had spoken with him and the threats he had made. This would be no ordinary year - he was now a Junior Professor and with that would come an authority he would no doubt abuse.

She tried to focus on Severus's assurances that he would protect her from Edmund. But doubt still nagged at her insides. How could Severus protect her when their marriage is to be secret? If Severus approached Edmund – surely it would expose their relationship and if that happened would Edmund seek to ruin both Lily and Severus? So many whispers in her head – but she had to have some faith in her husband and in herself.

She felt so safe with Severus and she trusted him so wholeheartedly but Hogwarts was not the same as being at home under her husbands' protection. Lily hated feeling that doubt nag at her – it made her feel weak.

Pushing aside her fears Lily was the first to break the silence. Seeing Severus was sullen and moody she treaded gently.

"Severus, will I see you this coming weekend?" Lily asked. They had discussed this before - she would remain at Hogwarts for the week, as he would, and they would meet up again on weekends. Of course they would also see each other during the Dark Arts class, meal times and as her House Master - but their association would only be of Professor and student.

"Probably not Lily." he replied a little sharply.

"Oh…" she replied. Her face fell very slightly, disappointment and a little hurt in her expression. All week and then no weekend with him - how would she endure it! Her head dropped and tried to hide her feelings.

Severus sighed and grimaced slightly. She was the last person he wanted to be moody and abrupt with.

He continued a little softer "It would appear I have to attend an orientation for our new Professors this weekend." He turned to her and lifted her chin with his finger smirking slightly and moving closer to her body. "However, there may be the odd occasion where I might be able to abscond and continue with our own orientation." He said smoothly.

She laughed a little, happier now she better understood the reason for his mood. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled his head down closer to hers, moving her body seductively against his "Well… I have most definitely enjoyed our induction so far." Lily kissed him very lightly on his mouth, teasing him and moved her hips suggestively against his feeling him starting to go hard.

_Hellfire_ Severus thought _How in the hell am I going to keep my hands off her all week!_ "Lily – if you don't desist from what you are doing – we will both be late for our first morning at Hogwarts." But he made no move to pull away from her embrace.

"Lily…stop now." He said whispered against her mouth very unconvincingly, moving his hands to her hips pulling her nearer.

"Hmmm are you sure?" she murmured gently running one hand down his body and stopping to caress him through his trousers.

He jerked slightly and gave her a dangerous look "Lily…" he said deeply.

She slowly undid the buttons on his trousers and slipped her hand in to take his erection in her hand. He groaned as she pumped her hand a few times down his shaft. "Fuck, Lily".

She teased him more, stroking him, knowing she was pushing his resolve. He growled and she knew his patience snapped as he grabbed her hips hard lifting her roughly onto the kitchen table and pulled her wet knickers off swiftly. Impatiently he pushed her legs apart wider and drove himself deep inside her warm moist tightness. He was in no mood for tenderness as he drove himself hard and deep into her, thrusting at a wild and fiery pace.

She wrapped her legs around him loving the fact that she could make him go over the edge like this and feeling the intense pleasure grow deep inside her.

There lovemaking was wild, furious and hot. She cried his name as she reached her climax digging her nails into his shoulders and he shouted loudly as he released himself within her.

They stayed together for sometime breathing heavily, coming down from their passionate and heated lovemaking.

He pulled away from her and adjusted his clothing watching her as she moved to get up from the table with her skirt flipped up, no underwear and still with her shoes and socks on. His mind was filled with a mental image of her looking like this on his desk at Hogwarts and he thought wickedly to himself that he would have to fulfill that fantasy at least once but more likely several times. He quietly congratulated himself on being perhaps the luckiest bastard alive at this moment.

"Well, fortunately I think I will still be able to walk straight." Lily said breathlessly pulling her underwear on, still reeling slightly from their frantic episode on the kitchen table.

He grinned slightly evilly "Well I never said I was always going to be a tender lover did I?" he said efficiently adjusting his sleeves "You certainly have a unique ability which can unravel my self-control to the point where I" he paused "… get carried away." He raised his eyebrow and gave her a dark sexy look which made her feel weak at the knees and her stomach flutter.

Lily blushed and rearranged her skirt and blouse, trying to regain some composure "Well Professor Snape – I think we had better go to Hogwarts." He nodded briskly.

"I will Disapparate and you take the Portkey so there will be no suspicion." He said and she nodded her understanding.

Both of them looked at each other briefly not prepared to speak about what they were feeling. They collected their thoughts and mentally prepared themselves for the adjustments they would have to make this coming year.

"See you in class Professor Snape." Lily said doing her best to push all arousing images of him out of her mind and trying to think of him as her Professor and House Master for the next week and coming months.

"Yes Miss Potter" he said coolly with his usual impenetrable façade.

With a pop Snape disappeared from the room and Lily sighed mulling over the double life she was now going to have to lead and wondering how it would work.

She stretched out her hand and touched the Portkey feeling that familiar pull at her navel as she whooshed from the room appearing outside the Slytherin common room.

The first few weeks were arduous and the adjustment was more difficult for Lily than Snape. He had lived a double life as Dumbledore's spy against Voldemort (a great deal more dangerous existence!) so the transition for him was effortless. He had no problem treating her as if she was just another student and never once accidentally called her Lily or made any error.

She, however, for some weeks would blush deeply when he was near and twice almost called him Severus, which bought about a hard warning look from her husband and a severe lecture that weekend about self-control and discipline. However, he softened a little when she looked so upset and wouldn't look at him. She was after all still young and inexperienced.

Eventually she settled down and they fell into a routine. Although one particular day, she lost some of her composure during one of his Dark Arts classes - she could not do a somewhat complicated protection spell. Even though only two people in the entire class managed to complete a partial protection he decided to make an example of her.

"Miss Potter – weak!" He spat out harshly "It would appear you have again managed the most feeble protection spell I have ever witnessed in my entire teaching career." he added coldly "Detention here at six o'clock."

She flushed bright red looking stunned and absolutely mortified. The rest of the class were either staring at their desk or looking anywhere but at their Professor not wanting to earn a detention.

"All of you pathetic." He sneered "I hope none of you are planning on becoming Aurors because I would not recommend any of you." He finished in disgust. "An extra essay for all of you – the five principles of a protection spell, in detail with examples, on my desk by Monday morning." This was met with a collective groan from the class and Snape snapped "Silence". A hush fell over the class as they resumed their work in silence.

Lily was furious at being singled out and made an example of and when class was dismissed would not even glance at him shoving her books into her bag angrily and storming out of the class in temper.

He smiled to himself – she certainly was attractive when she was riled and he looked forward to what detention might bring.

She did not attend dinner that night but decided to eat in her room and focus on completing the essay that he had asked for. Lily was irritated and feeling moody – it was the first time she felt truly angry with him.

Six o'clock came and she did not even knock on his door but just simply walked straight in banging the door slightly behind her. He didn't flinch as she came in and simply stood with his back to her gently closing a rather large heavy looking book.

She walked to the desk at the front of the room and sat down huffily with her arms crossed over her chest, crossing her legs in irritation looking mutinously at his back.

"Lily – I am pleased to see you are punctual as always." he said smoothly using her first name, turning to face her.

She didn't reply but tossed her head slightly and looked away.

"Hmm it would appear you are still angry with me." He said with a smirk not at all perturbed by her demeanor. She didn't reply and wouldn't look at him, still feeling pissed off.

"Perhaps I could make it up to you?" he said silkily moving behind her leaning down close to her ear.

"Unlikely." she replied waspishly.

He sighed in irritation and flicked his hand using a spell to spin her chair around to face him.

"We have precious time during this detention Lily – it is up to you how we use it." He said sharply.

"You want to have sex!?" she asked incredulously "After humiliating me and making an example of me in front of the entire class – unfairly too I might add!" she said feeling anger stirring hotly inside her, standing up to face him.

"I could hardly give you detention based on a trivial detail could I Lily, it would raise suspicion." He said severely "Not only that my criticism was justified – your protection spell was weak at best." he added cruelly.

His words stung her and she felt wounded and cross. Lashing out verbally she retaliated "Well perhaps if you were a better teacher and a better seducer you might have A – a student that could produce that protection spell and B – a wife that wants to have sex with you after humiliating her!"

He looked livid and she looked unhappy and angry. This was their first argument and the experience was not an enjoyable one.

They stood facing one another for some time neither of them speaking or moving.

He spoke first – cold and hard like stone and ice "Get out." he hissed.

She felt the tears prickle behind her eyes but said nothing and stiffly picked her bag up and walked out of the room not looking back at him, but feeling his eyes boring into her back.

She did not let the tears fall until she had reached the sanctuary of her bed and they came in loud harsh sobs. There were some sympathetic looks from her peers who knew she had detention with Snape. All of them dreading the same fate that Lily had suffered – and from such a frightful man! What had transpired – they all wondered and shuddered at the thought of it.

Class the next day was awful. Snapes keen observation skills could tell she had been crying coupled with her unusually subdued manner during the lesson. He felt a twinge of regret – he had been harsh with her but it was for her own good. It was vitally important she be able to protect herself – especially as Edmund Umbridge was here at Hogwarts. Although Umbridge seemed to be being extra cautious knowing he was being instructed and observed by senior staff members.

He sighed to himself and as he dismissed the class, the last one for the week, he said coolly "Miss Potter – please remain behind, I wish to speak with you."

Lily froze and felt her heart skip – she did not want a repeat of last night, she was still feeling sick about their encounter.

The last of the students filed out some looking concerned and glad it wasn't them.

The door closed and he waved his wand languidly to protect the door and their privacy.

She stood rooted to the spot – not wanting to face him – she still felt raw and hurt from their fight.

He moved close to her and gently took her hand "Lily…sometimes I can be an unfeeling man - I am often more critical and more severe on those that are dearest to me." She looked at him her emotions clear on her face – hurt, upset and a little sadness. Gods he hated seeing her look that way!

"I apologize for my harsh words – I promise you they were not unkindly meant." He said frankly watching her closely for her response.

Lily gave a little stifled cry and moved into the circle of his arms, hugging him – he (and she) felt relief.

"Severus I am so sorry for what _I said_." She muffled slightly in his chest "…you know I think you are the most wonderful, brilliant and most effective, teacher…in the classroom… _and_ in the bedroom." She added with a small smile.

She heard and felt him laugh a little and raised her head to look at his face. Saying teasingly and possessively "Although I am the only one that gets your coaching in bed."

"Oh I think you are about to have a lesson right now - on my desk." He replied huskily kissing her mouth savoring the feel and taste of her.

"…the door Severus." She whispered against his mouth moving her hands to unbutton his jacket and shirt eagerly.

"….done already." He answered lifting her up, wrapping her legs around his hips. Carrying her to his desk he put her on it only moving away to slowly take her underwear off and with deliberate leisure take her blouse and bra off. His face was dark with desire as he looked hotly at her exposed full breasts with her pert nipples - lowering his head he gently sucked and teased her nipples and pushed his two fingers into her, thrusting slow and deep watching her squirm in pleasure.

She threaded her fingers threw his hair and moaned and writhed in delight.

They spent the next long while totally abandoning all self-control, delighting in each others pleasure – discovering that profound closeness that only lovers who give themselves so completely can find.

A/N: More to come – not much plot at the moment but there will be more, so stay tuned. By the way thanks so much for your reviews – so very much appreciated!


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